A Preface & That Winter; Part 2 of 3

It's been exactly three weeks since I last posted. The thing is, I've been trying to write Part 2 every day for three weeks.
I'd like to blame it on getting the flu or other things going on right now, but the truth? Fleshing these parts of my story out into words is painful. It simultaneously stings & creates a familiar, yet unwelcome hollow feeling in my gut, reminiscent of seven years ago.
It feels almost counterproductive to revisit this in depth, especially after experiencing such healing & freedom. But I guess that's the thing. Not writing about it would be counterproductive & counter-healing; shoving it away into the recesses feeds the darkness.
So let's move forward slowly, trekking in the light.
 

And so I continued to run from Him...to the Middle East. Probably not an ideal escape for most, but it's mine.

As I made the first leg across the pond, I remember sitting in solitude, ironically hopeful that He would use this trip to bring healing, even though I was running from Him. It still doesn't make much sense seven years later, but at the time I was desperate for relief.

It's a curious thing to hold a belief that the One whom you think has ultimately caused you pain will also bring about a cure. But at the time, my beliefs about who God is & His character were so fundamentally skewed, logic wasn't necessary. A miracle was.

It snowed one afternoon during my trip, & for the first time in months, I felt compelled to open my Bible. Heck! I felt compelled to pray! And as I glanced out the window watching the snow fall, lyrics I had never heard before sang out of my laptop-

He will take you
If you run,
He will chase you

I wept. The numb melted into emotion.

He was there. 
I stopped running when I realized I could run into His arms.

To be continued. 🌼